"There's nowt so queer as folk"


by Andrew Bryant - Executive Coach, Author and Trainer of Neuro Semantics and NLP

As you read this update, I am back to my roots in England. My mother's side of the family were from Durham in the North, where the original expression 'Nowt so queer as folk' was common. Translated, this means that people are often strange and different. I am sure you have met some strange and different people in your time.

From my previous articles you will remember that we do not respond to reality but to our mental map of reality. People therefore behave in accordance with their mental maps. To communicate, or create change we must therefore understand the listener's map.

To do this requires some perceptual flexibility. The North American Indians have an expression that to understand a man you have to walk a mile in his moccasins. This is not always convenient in today's busy corporate world - and besides you risk catching Tinea!

An alternative technique to train your awareness is to take three chairs and arrange them like this.

Sit in the 1 st position and imagine the person you are trying to understand sitting in the 2nd position chair.

When you are in position 1 you see the person in position 2 through your eyes, you experience them through your senses, you evaluate them through your mental map.

Your mind has the flexibility to conceive what it would be like to be in the 2nd position. Move to the 2nd position chair - can imagine what it would be like to 'be' that person? - how they feel, how they see the world? Try this for a few moments and you'll be amazed at the insights you get.

Now move yourself and your awareness to the 3rd position. In this position you are aware of yourself, your needs and wants as well as being aware of the other person's agenda and can therefore take a logical or negotiation view point.

Finally stand up and see all three viewpoints from a 4th perspective - the system or company perspective. What would be best for the team or the company? Now combine all viewpoint and sit back in the 1st position. How will you now behave and communicate to this person?

This exercise has many applications from team building to customer service.

For more details on public or corporate trainings from Andrew Bryant and
Self Leadership International
visit: www.selfleadership.com.au

Sydney Preview:
Thursday 17th July, 2004
7.00-9.00pm Vibe Hotel, Milsons Point
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Trainings 2004:
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Fear Mastery
Sydney, July 3-4
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The New Psychology of Sales
Sydney, July 5-6
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Coaching Essentials
Sydney, July 10-11
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Neuro Semantic and NLP Certification
Business Focus - Modular Format
Sydney
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